My Infinite Wisdom Blog

miWisdom today… People have a tendency to say things in a certain way which can stir up negative emotions in other individuals. One must be aware and wary not to get drawn into these kinds of traps, otherwise one is giving full control of their behaviour over to the other person which can easily be taken advantage of. One must therefore come to know and understand the other person’s intentions before they have a chance to overwhelm you.

Once our emotions start to get the better of us we psychologically lose control of the situation. Be it anger, jealousy, anxiety, stress or any other overwhelming emotion, we fall into the trap of reacting to situations instead of proactively taking control over them.

To proactively take control of a situation without being drawn into emotional re-activeness, ask yourself the following set of questions:

• What is it that this person is trying to do through their words or actions? What are their real intentions?
• How is it that this person wants me to respond to their words or actions?
• What is it specifically that I would like to gain control of in this situation?
• What is the ideal outcome I would like to achieve?
• If I cannot gain some kind of control over external people, events or circumstances, than what is it that I can control internally from an emotional and mental perspective?
• What is the best way to project my emotions given the current circumstances and the outcomes that I seek?
• How do I choose to project my emotions in the moment that will serve my greater good and allow me to take charge of this situation?

If you have a similar learning experience or would like to add to the list of questions, you may do so by commenting below.